Hello four, hello five.

One of Juliette’s daycare teachers complimented me the other day. She told me that it was great that I let Juliette wear all blue, play baseball, and run around with her pants on backwards or her shirt inside out. She commented that so many parents force their kids to dress or act a certain way and it is nice to see that I am encouraging Juliette to be confident and independent.

I smiled and said Thank You. And then I thought about how unpleasant life would be if I didn’t let Juliette have her way on these sorts of issues; issues that I don’t think are worth fighting about. So what if her pants are unzipped? If she can’t zip them up, then she is going to have a hard time zipping them down again when running to the potty. So what if her shirt is inside out? She dresses herself in the morning, and when something is awry insists that she did it that way because that’s the way she likes it. And who cares if she wants to wear blue non flowery- non girly pants? At least they are clean. And at least she is wearing the pants. As I have said before, she’d be even happier if I let her go out naked- and that is an argument we have had on more then one occasion.

I want my daughter to feel like she can do things herself. And I think I am succeeding at that. But sometimes I wonder if I let her get away with too much, just because I am tired and have so little time and don’t want to deal with the crying and whining. I am her mother, not her friend and someone has to set boundaries. It is for her own good, after all. If I had insisted that she not wear her rain boots the other day, then she wouldn’t have tripped over her own two feet and fallen face forward, sliding down the slate steps onto the gravel driveway, leading to a scraped and bloody nose. Unfortunately the scrape was in a spot not easy to apply a band-aid too. Band-aids are the miraculous cure all for Juliette’s various woes- as soon as she pats the sticky bandage onto her appendage-whether or not there is a real hurt there- she feels all better. That, plus her blankie and a hug from me.

Juliette is growing up at a gale force pace. But not, thank goodness, as fast as she thinks. She told me the other day that pretty soon she was going to be five, and then she was going to be a mommy just like me. I corrected her only enough to remind her that first she has to be four years old, and after that comes five. I'm not ready to explain why she can't be a mommy at that age! I am reassured that she is still my little girl, though, when she tells me "I love when you take care of me mommy. I love to just stay home." If she said that to me while I was at work, I think I'd march right into my bosses office and give notice straightaway. Fortunately (?) that hasn't happened yet, but the day may come!